These last few weeks, I’ve gotten a lot of questions about my newest tattoo — a portrait of Abraham Lincoln on my right shoulder.
“Why Abraham Lincoln? Is it because there are rumors he was gay?” Well, no, but I do appreciate the opportunity to make a Gaybraham Lincoln pun, thank you.
“Why Abraham Lincoln? Do you want to make sure everyone knows that you really hate slavery?” Wait, was there ever a question about my stance on slavery?!
“Why Abraham Lincoln? Is it because you’re a hipster, and hipsters have beards, and he had a beard, and he was tall and skinny and wore a weird hat — so he was, in a sense, kind of the original hipster?” …What?
“So, why Abraham Lincoln?”